Polly want a beer?

A man in Mexico City was arrested for drunk driving after his pet parakeet squawked at a routine alcohol checkpoint. As the driver, Guillermo Reyes, got out of his car to be tested for alcohol in his system, police heard a voice from inside the car crying, “He’s drunk!” Police thought there was another person in the car, but the only other occupant was Reyes’ pet parakeet. Reyes was, in fact, found to be driving under the influence of alcohol. Both Reyes and the bird were taken to El Torito prison for the night. There was no word on how Reyes felt about his lovebird-turned-stool-pigeon.

Personal space

An exclusive club has opened in London where strangers can take part in mass cuddle sessions. Cuddle Workshop, opened by owners Anna Shekory and Tom Mayer, offers classes in addition to mass cuddles where “cuddle wishes” are fulfilled, as well as “freestyle cuddling,” in which dozens of strangers snuggle on the floor. The club’s owners claim that physical contact such as cuddling releases oxytocin, which increases self-esteem and helps people feel more comfortable in their own bodies. Shekory and Mayer have given new meaning to the Beatles song “Come Together.”

Delay of game

When faced with the decision to either watch the San Francisco 49ers’ playoff game or to give a service at his church, a priest came to an unusual conclusion: Shorten the church service. Pastor Tim Christensen cut his church service down to a single minute in order to be able to watch his football game. The pastor absolved the congregation of their sins, directed them to the bread and wine sitting at the back of the church and revealed his 49ers jersey under his robes before kissing his biceps in an impression of Colin Kaepernick and leaving to watch the game. It’s too bad there can’t be a 49ers game every Sunday.

In stitches

A Spanish artist uses unusual means to keep his family close at hand. Twenty-one-year-old David Cata embroiders portraits of his loved ones into the palm of his hand. The pictures of his embroidery are part of a project called “Overexposed Emotions.” The goal of the project is to show how deeply his loved ones are woven into his life. Each embroidered portrait takes about four hours to complete before Cata films himself pulling the stitches out of his hand. Apparently Cata takes the idea of keeping your family close a bit too seriously.

Motormouth

Three women in Wales got more than they bargained for on a night out when they were attacked by a stranger, 26-year-old Rhian Jeremiah. Jeremiah had been drinking at a memorial for her boyfriend before she attacked the women. The witnesses were parked outside of a takeout restaurant when Jeremiah aggressively approached them. Jeremiah tried to pull the car door open, and then bit into the roof of the car, leaving impressions of her teeth and more than $300 worth of damage. Jeremiah was clearly unaware that a Sorrento’s pizza is much cheaper when the late-night munchies strike.