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Eckroate: Pumpkins are not as good as you think. Calm down, Pitt

Autumn is the season of sweatshi rts, football games, blankets, cuddling, crunchy leaves and an overall content mood across campus, as the humidity slips away for a few months.

But the fuss over fall isn’t about any of these things. Once the white shorts and sundresses are put in the back of the closet after Labor Day, all we seem to care about is the return of pumpkin-flavored foods and drinks.

Pumpkin and fall: the obvious pair. Nothing says “fall” quite like those childhood memories of going to the pumpkin patch to pick out just the right one for your jack-o’-lantern. At some point, someone took this fond memory of pumpkins too far and decided that it would be a great idea to pumpkinize every single product with its flavor. Pumpkin spice lattes, pumpkin beer, pumpkin margaritas, pumpkin cookies, pumpkin scones, pumpkin pancakes, pumpkin bread, pumpkin bagels, pumpkin cream cheese and pumpkin pie are just some examples of the food and drinks into which pumpkin has infused itself.

For whatever reason, everyone has jumped on this pumpkin bandwagon. But we haven’t jumped on it so much as we have tethered ourselves to it, clinging to every day that we can enjoy a pumpkin muffin as though there’s another pumpkin shortage.

Remember that Halloween special, “It’s The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown”? The Great Pumpkin would visit the most sincere pumpkin patch and deliver toys to the children. With the extreme obsession over pumpkin products, you’d think we’re all vying for the same kind of attention here: It’s a contest to see who is the most devoted pumpkin fan.

Honestly, I don’t actually dislike all of the different pumpkin products. But I certainly do not believe that this pumpkin popularity deserves to be as widespread and, frankly, blown out of proportion, as it has become.

Take Starbucks, for example. This was the second year in a row the coffee giant has sponsored the “Pumpkin Spice Latte Challenge.” Fans of the coffee shop’s pumpkin spice latte earned points for their respective cities by answering questions on the Facebook fan page. The contest guaranteed to be a level playing field for all cities, regardless of size. The city with the most points would get to enjoy pumpkin spice lattes a week before the rest of the country.

At first, I thought I had misunderstood. A week? That’s it?

People were fighting tooth and nail to start drinking a pumpkin beverage on Aug. 25 instead of further enduring the agony until Sept. 4. Talk about a first-world problem. As far as I am concerned, “fall” things should not be on anyone’s radar until after Labor Day. Too soon, Starbucks. The pumpkin fire does not need the additional fuel.

By going crazy over pumpkin coffee beverages, people forget about other wonderful drinks that Starbucks features during this season. For example, chai tea lattes have that same warm fall feeling with cinnamon and spice flavors: a perfect complement to crisp autumn mornings. Like the beloved pumpkin spice latte, coffee lovers can enjoy the spice in chai as a solid alternative choice. It’s a healthier alternative, too, with fewer calories, less fat and less sugar than Starbucks’ pumpkin spice latte. As an added bonus, the Indian tradition behind the beverage is one of healing.

What about salted caramel mochas, the Starbucks seasonal drink released alongside pumpkin spice lattes? Salty and sweet — a perfect autumnal combination. As the other limited-time-only beverage, it would seem as though there is a power struggle between the pumpkin spice latte and the spiced caramel mocha: take your pick on Starbucks’ Facebook page. Make sure you give both a chance.

When it comes to food, think about the seasonal advertisements at the Einstein Bros. Bagels locations on campus. I see a pumpkin bagel smothered with pumpkin cream cheese. Nothing sounds less appealing.

Have we all forgotten the concept of “too much of a good thing?” This pumpkin-on-pumpkin order is just overload, a mouthful of nothing but that orange color. Take a plainer bagel and jazz it up with the seasonal cream cheese. You still enjoy the pumpkin flavor, but this way, it’s distinct from the bagel itself.

Check out the pastry display case. Pumpkin dominates yet again. I’m sure that a pumpkin scone would taste great with coffee. But again, don’t overdose here. Pumpkin plus plain equals great combination.

If you recall, recent years have involved pumpkin shortages following poor harvest conditions. This, of course, increased the price of the limited supply, whether sold in a can or off the vine. At the rate we’re going, forget farming problems. We’re just eating all of the pumpkins that survive excessive rainfall, or in other years, drought.

I know pumpkin is a great addition to fall menus. It fits with the atmosphere of the season, and it allows us to move into cooler temperatures and busy schoolwork without longing for summer too much. But please, take the obsession down a notch. Or two.

Tell Claire about alternative fall flavors at ceckroate@gmail.com.

Pitt News Staff

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Pitt News Staff

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