Rental Guide: More to ideal roommate relationships that neatness

In a perfect world, you would find a roommate who never woke you up early or kept you up late,… In a perfect world, you would find a roommate who never woke you up early or kept you up late, never fought you for the remote and wouldn’t dream of snacking on your groceries. But although that isn’t the world we live in and concessions must be made, arranging a good living situation off campus takes serious consideration.

If everything goes horribly wrong, there aren’t RAs or mediators to sort things out. And signing a lease is a legal obligation that could be tough to get out of.

“When you sign a lease [with a roommate], you become one entity. You become responsible for each other, a single unit.” said Kevin Stiles, manager of leasing and support services for Pitt’s Office of Off-Campus Living. “I would say be proactive — do everything reasonably possible to prevent finding yourself in a bad lease situation.”

But with a few considerations, your chances of finding that perfect roommate are much higher.

Roommates: Living with your best friends might seem like a dream come true at first. You can spend all of your time together! But … that means you’ll be spending all of your time together. Most of us know someone or other who excitedly signed up to live with his best friend and that ended the friendship right there. Being best friends does not equal a perfectly harmonious living situation.

If you rule out living with your closest friends, are you doomed to a life of singles and efficiencies? Not necessarily. Before you try your luck with Craigslist — or Pitt’s own roommate-matching website — consider people you know reasonably well outside the realm of your usual social circle.

Is there someone from work or a former classmate you got along with well? Don’t be skittish of coed housing possibilities either: Provided there is no romantic tension (and I really can’t stress enough how important that is), sometimes a friend of the opposite gender can make a great living partner.

Traits: The first words that probably spring into your mind as roommate attributes, “neat” and “messy,” aren’t simply defined terms. Maybe you haven’t seen your bedroom floor in months, but your kitchen must be spotless at all times. Think about how much shared living space you’ll have and whether you and your roomie-to-be can find a comfortable middle ground.

Even if you both have the same neatness levels, there are other factors to consider. If one roommate studies all the time and needs quiet and the other is constantly hosting shindigs and blasting loud music, there’s a good chance contention will arise. Consider whether your lifestyles will mesh well enough for you to be constantly in proximity.

Number: More people means costs are more broadly divided, yes — but at the price of adding complexity and potential for conflict with each new personality combination. And with more people, there’s always the risk of cliques and alliances forming — that additional drama is unnecessary.

Price: Before any apartment-hunting shenanigans ensue, discuss what you want and how much you can pay. If you’re scavenging for places in different neighborhoods and different price ranges, you’re going to have a problem. As much as it might be tough, if you’re not willing to compromise and your friend can’t afford the same things you can, the roomie relationship isn’t ideal.

Ground rules: Nothing destroys a pleasant living situation as devastatingly as passive aggression — and that often springs up from a miscommunication of expectations (i.e., doing your dishes right away versus putting them in the sink until the end of the night).

Establish ground rules for the space as soon as possible, ideally before you move in. Consider discussing:

1. Who will do what chores and when?

2. Who will be responsible for making sure rent and utilities get paid on time?

3. When is it OK to have guests over? How many? What about overnight visitors?

4. Where is the line with romantic relationships? (Remember, signing a lease with one person could mean getting stuck with his significant other regularly).

5. How do each of you feel about hosting parties or social events?