Categories: EditorialsOpinions

Casual Fridays

Snapchat Story

This week, a Maine citizen wanted for burglary proved to authorities that he really had the best Snapchat story. Christopher Wallace allegedly stole a propane cook stove and a cast iron wood stove from a nearby campsite in January. While on the run, Wallace posted on Snapchat that he was back at his home in Fairfield. Though this tipped off the police, they couldn’t catch him because they didn’t screenshot the evidence in time. Luckily, Wallace posted another Snapchat that revealed he was hiding in a cabinet in his home. With just a snapshot, in a snap, he was caught. Officials say that police are still grilling him in custody.

Cat Got Your Car?

Earlier this week, one feline showed the world how to take life by the reins — or leash, in this case. Ohio police are looking for the Catmobile in question after a photo of a cat riding on the hood of a car — secured via leash — went viral. Police Chief Michael Goodwin said that the main concern was public safety. However, projectile hairballs could be a concern, too. The cat in question was cited saying, “Get meowt of here.” So, if anyone sees this Cat-illac, be sure to contact authorities.

Rabbit Food

It seems that Bugs Bunny has really let himself go, in light of recent events. Dorothy Davies opted to enter her rabbit Grace, a double-chinned, obese rabit into the PDSA Pet Fit Club competition after realizing her bunny had a few carrots too many. At this rate, the tortoise would beat the hare — Grace has moved from rabbit food to eating guinea-pig food. If she doesn’t get her act together, she really will be asking, “What’s up, Doc?” at the vet’s office.

What a Pig

This mammal really likes her premium hogger — sorry, lager. It seems Babe has let it all hang out this week. Frances Bacon, a micro-pig, was banned from a pub for drinking. When the pig gets tipsy, she headbutts the people around her — not to mention she hogs up too much space.

Buggin’ Out

A 65-year-old man was really buggin’ out when he arrived at a Brazilian hospital earlier this week. It turned out that it might have been more appropriate to call Pest Control than go to a doctor, considering over 100 maggots were living inside the man’s nasal passage. Indeed, he had caught a bit of a bug. The man is still undergoing treatment, and the doctors are using all of their ter-might to debug him.

Pitt News Staff

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Pitt News Staff

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