Editorial | Takeaways from the Pittsburgh Pigeons football game

While there may have been a football game at Acrisure Stadium on Saturday that some people were interested in, the real game happened between the pigeons on the field. They swooped in and wouldn’t leave the field — partially because they couldn’t figure out how to exit the stadium and partially to dominate in a game of their own, pigeon football against the Virginia Tech Vultures.

Kenny Pigeon, the former quarterback for the Pittsburgh Pigeons, came back to show Kedon Slovis how it’s done. While Slovis missed easy openings right and left and threw interceptions, Kenny Pigeon flew in around the 60 yard line and strutted around the field, even getting more first downs than the Panthers themselves! 

While Slovis threw a painful interception to Virginia Tech’s human football player Keonta Jenkins, Kenny Pigeon was able to score for the Pittsburgh Pigeons. He found some peanuts that someone threw onto the field and brought the rest of the pigeons over to them to eat — a stunning feat in the game of pigeon football.

Not only did Israel Abanikanda have a great game, scoring a Pitt record of six touchdowns in one game, but his pigeon counterpart Israel Abeakakanda was also the only pigeon player who didn’t fly into the field goal post during the game. Bravo to them both — we can’t wait to see what you accomplish next!

Speaking of Abanikanda, he also broke former quarterback Tony Dorsett’s rushing record with 230 yards. While we don’t know how the real Dorsett felt about this, Tony Dovesett, the former Pittsburgh Pigeons star running back, definitely had a lot to say about Abeakakanda’s new record.

“It’s really amazing that Abeakakanda was able to fly around the field and never once hit the goal post,” Dovesett said. “He’s a really great player and I’m glad he was able to find the courage to beat my record, I’m really proud of him.”

Dovesett held the former record of only flying into the field goal post 535 times in his career and only 10 times in one game. Abeakakanda’s record is almost unheard of in the pigeon ACC — also known as the Aviary Coast Conference. Hopefully, Abeakakanda will continue this streak and take the Pittsburgh Pigeons all the way to the championships against other hopeful teams such as the Syracuse Songbirds, Miami Mourning Doves or even the North Carolina Nightingales. 

The botched snap by the Panthers, leading to a touchdown by the Hokies, might have made some fans cringe, but it hurt the Pittsburgh Pigeons more. When the Panthers snapped the ball, the birds hanging out near the end zone got scared and flew to the opposite end of the field, giving the Virginia Tech Vultures better position on the field.

All in all, the Pittsburgh Pigeons won the game, but it came down to the wire. Just as the Virginia Tech Vultures swooped in to block a touchdown, Kenny Pigeon flew a Hail Mary pass to Israel Abeakakanda — in pigeon football this means he threw a tab of an empty beer can that someone threw onto the field — and Abeakakanda swooped into the Pigeon’s end zone without hitting a field goal post and scored a touchdown. 

Congratulations to the Pittsburgh Pigeons!