Molly Green breaks down the fall TV line-up

Every fall, major television networks conjure up several dozen new series — half of which will… Every fall, major television networks conjure up several dozen new series — half of which will fail abysmally, some of which, despite being redundant crap, will do marvelously well, and a few that will achieve the rare combination of being both novel and well-produced.

This new season is heavy on crime dramas and romantic-comedy sitcoms, which are, incidentally, my two least favorite, and probably the most over-worked, genres of television. Many of the shows are more of the same, while others are uniquely atrocious. There are, however, a few promising gems to look forward to.

ABC:

ABC — the so-called network of “drama” — will be premiering several medical dramas (surprise, surprise), three sit-coms and two slightly more original dramas, none of which look to be a life-altering television experience.

The good: The most intriguing of ABC’s new line-up is definitely “No Ordinary Family,” which is basically the live-action, TV version of the movie “The Incredibles.” It even stars Michael Chiklis as the newly super-powered family’s patriarch. If the show’s writing is smart and it can combine family drama with science-fiction in a satisfying way, this could be a show to watch.

The bad: If ABC loves anything, it’s unrealistic medical dramas and reviving the careers of middle-aged has-been actresses. It’s no doubt, then, that the network couldn’t wait to get its greedy little hands on “Body of Proof,” which stars Dana Delaney as an oh-so-sassy, top-of-her-field neurosurgeon-turned-medical examiner, who is forced to reevaluate her life after a “devastating” car crash. While Delaney is a good actress, the show is basically an extended Lifetime movie. I’ll pass.

And the Shonda: The network is, of course, also premiering its new Shonda Rhimes drama, “Off the Map,” which appears to be “Grey’s Anatomy” meets Doctors Without Borders. At first glance, the show looks innocuous enough, but I know Rhimes too well and can only assume that it will be riddled with angsty monologues and dialogue somewhere along the lines of: “I am here to help people. People. Those people there. Who are dying every day. Every day!” Good for drinking games and mindless TV viewing.

NBC:

Personally, I think NBC has the strongest showing of new shows, though the network’s record for producing new, quality dramas has been dubious as of late. Still, most of its upcoming series have refreshing uniqueness, which — admittedly — could also be their downfall.

The good: NBC has three new dramas worth mentioning, but I’m most excited about “The Cape.” Think “Batman” meets “Sin City” meets the circus. Everything about it — the plot, the style of filming, the characters, the special effects — looks really cool. The story chronicles a cop framed for a crime he did not commit, taken in by circus folk and trained to defend himself/fight corruption under a super-hero-like alias: The Cape. Other notables are government-conspiracy drama “The Event” and J.J. Abrams’ new spy drama, “The Undercovers.”

The bad: “Love Bites,” a show dedicated to telling various women’s tales of dating woes. It’s what I call an “Erin show,” so named for my sister, who has a strange taste for Hallmark made-for-TV movies and Amy Adams chick flicks.

And the sequel: “Law & Order: Los Angeles.” Really? Another one?

Fox:

Fox produced a mixed bag of really-freaking-sweet dramas and awful — just awful — sitcoms.

The good: “Lonestar” is the story of a Texas conman who is leading a double-life and romancing a different woman in each one. The combination of deceit with genuine affection for the two leading ladies should produce interesting conflict and, hopefully, some great television.

The bad: “Bob’s Burgers” is the animated comedy from Fox. As it centers about a family-owned burger joint, I have to assume this will be in the same vein as “Family Guy” and “The Simpsons,” which means some people will undoubtedly enjoy this show.

And the really bad: How do I explain new romantic comedy “Running Wilde”? It’s like a cross between a Kate Hudson romantic comedy and, well, a Will Arnett movie. Needless to say, it looks bad. Real bad.

CBS:

It’s rare that I like a show on CBS. I feel like the majority of its series consist of laugh-track sitcoms and crime shows. And that’s basically what we are getting for its new fall season.

The good: “Hawaii Five-0.” It’s a crime show that actually looks good! The stellar cast, which includes Alex O’Loughlin and Daniel Dae Kim, was enough to get me interested. But more than that, the writing is smart, and the whole show looks pretty bad-ass.

The bad: There is a show that is currently listed on CBS’s website as “Untitled Criminal Minds Spinoff.” Enough said.

And the Shatner: Honestly I love William Shatner. I think he is an icon, and he can get away with things no other actor can. But “$#*! My Dad Says” looks truly awful. It’s just Shatner being Shatner — that is, saying really rude, inappropriate things, but somehow, it’s not even funny.