“Fame” will be on hard-to-remember name

Ralph Branca “Fame”

Starring: Kay Panabaker, Asher Book, Naturi Naughton

Director: Kevin… Ralph Branca “Fame”

Starring: Kay Panabaker, Asher Book, Naturi Naughton

Director: Kevin Tancharoen

Studio: MGM Studios

Grade: B-

It doesn’t really fly, it sure as hell isn’t going to live forever, but with the conservative, PG-rated content, it should have no problem making it to heaven.

Still, though, it might not quite live up to its title song, the 2009 remake — scratch that, reinvention — of “Fame” provides enough choreographed, visceral thrills to balance out the minimal character development and plotting.

Irene Cara might be hanging her head in shame in Hollywood Has-Been Land, but that doesn’t mean a new generation of performing arts-junkies won’t remember the youthful cast’s names — or the lyrics to that insanely catchy song.

Diving headfirst into the lives of a wide variety of talented students at the New York City High School of the Performing Arts, “Fame” blatantly struggles to grasp onto the coattails of “High School Musical” and recent television smash “Glee.”

There are plenty of characters on display: the shy actress (Kay Panabaker), her too-cute love interest (Asher Book), the good-girl-waiting-to-go-diva (Naturi Naughton), a dancer born without a personality (Kherington Payne, hot off her “So You Think You Can Dance” success) and the boy “from the streets” who just wants to act (Collins Pennie).

These are just a few of the young actors who appear to relish the opportunity to play out the tweeny melodrama onscreen. Denise (Naughton) is a classical pianist under pressure from her parents. But she really just wants to become a singer? Yawn. And Jenny (Panabaker) is torn between following her ambition or her heart. This is no “Degrassi.”

The film takes its good-old time plopping the dialogue-heavy non-performance scenes throughout its depiction of the characters’ four years at the school. However, when the kids finally decide to dance, sing, act and perform, “Fame” hits its stride like a ballet dancer landing a perfect pique turn.

It might just be the drama geek inside all of us, but it’s impossible not to be enthralled by watching such glossy and superbly edited displays of talent. An all-too-brief yet still incredible modern dance number set to Sam Sparro’s “Black and Gold”? I’ll take an entire film of just that.

Whereas the original “Fame” movie and its stage adaptation reveled in examining the seedier sides of the quest for celebrity, the remake is maddeningly tame. Sure, it reminds the audience that not everyone can be famous — which is just super-duper — but where are the drug addictions and unwanted teen pregnancies?

The film, in its most blatant display of kid-friendly artifice, only offers the most subtle hint at one of the characters being gay. Producers, this is a performing arts school in New York City, and you expect us to believe there is only one possibly gay kid in attendance? The audience members were not born yesterday.

The movie is a frustrating endeavor, but “Fame” does offer its pleasures in small and scattered doses. Besides the performance scenes, watching Megan Mullally, Kelsey Grammar and “Fame” alumni Debbie Allen go through the motions as teachers at the school alleviates some of the syrupy sweetness. Mullally especially gives perhaps the most realistic interpretation of a life devoted to the performing arts. Touching, but the audience gets the feeling the kids don’t really listen to her warning.

Naturi Naughton, with a voice that would give Beyonce chills, will hopefully walk away from the film ready to take on the title song’s message with full force — it’s not a coincidence that she sings the remake.

“You ain’t seen the best of me yet. Give me time I’ll make you forget the rest,” Naughton belts over the closing credits.

I’ll be waiting, Naturi.