Pitt loses millions in

Editor’s note: This story appeared as part of The Pitt News 2009 April Fools’ edition. It is a… Editor’s note: This story appeared as part of The Pitt News 2009 April Fools’ edition. It is a work of fiction produced solely for entertainment value.

Just weeks after losing $65 million to a Ponzi scheme, Pitt has again fallen subject to bad luck in a major investment.

‘A desperate Nigerian prince e-mailed us for help,’ said Chancellor Mark Nordenberg in a prepared statement. ‘It seemed fool-proof.’

An individual claiming to be a Nigerian prince named Mike Okoya e-mailed Nordenberg last August asking for the University’s bank account information, saying that he needed to transfer 100 million lira (about $60 million) into a foreign account and would be willing to give Pitt 40 percent of the amount if it would hold onto the money until the prince could reach Pittsburgh to share the money with Nordenberg.

‘We made a conservative investment designed to deliver modest returns with little risk,’ said Nordenberg.

University officials were first excited by the request for an ‘URGENT BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP’ and were flattered by Okaya’s ‘MAXIMUM CONFIDENCE of [Pitt’s] ability and reliability to prosecute a transaction of this GREAT MAGNITUDE,’ especially given that said transaction was, in Okaya’s words, ‘involving a pending transaction requiring MAXIMUM CONFIDENCE and BROTHERHOOD,’ the e-mail said.

After Nordenberg provided University account information, e-mails from Okoya grew less frequent until they stopped altogether last week, the Chancellor said.

Upon checking the account balance for Pitt’s Capital Campaign the next day, Nordenberg said he noticed about $250 million missing from the fund.