Blame Phelps for National League Cy Young debate

‘ ‘ ‘ Michael Phelps might be the reason nobody is talking about Tim Lincecum. ‘ ‘ ‘ … ‘ ‘ ‘ Michael Phelps might be the reason nobody is talking about Tim Lincecum. ‘ ‘ ‘ Prospects are being summoned, the Major League Baseball regular season wanes, and the grumbling about who deserves the American League and National League Cy Young, MVP and Rookie of the Year awards turns into raging rabble. ‘ ‘ ‘ This year’s Cy Young debate is especially heavy, all because of CC Sabathia. ‘ ‘ ‘ Sabathia’s been throwing such serious filth with the Brewers since being traded from Cleveland in late June that it’s amazing the lights inside Miller Park even bother turning on every fifth day. With a 9-0 record and a 1.43 ERA in just 11 starts, his numbers are … what’s the word … ridiculous. ‘ ‘ ‘ But so are Lincecum’s. And he plays for one of the worst teams in baseball. ‘ ‘ ‘ Lincecum, just 24 years old, has the stuff and stats just as godly as Sabathia’s: 15-3 with a 2.60 ERA as of Wednesday. Thing is, though, those numbers span the whole season. And he’d have five more wins by now if his bullpen hadn’t blown the many leads he gave them. ‘ ‘ ‘ Sabathia has pitched the whole year, too, but because he was traded from the American League to the National League, his numbers from Cleveland don’t count toward his NL Cy Young resume because they weren’t accrued in the National League. So, favoring Sabathia for the Cy Young essentially cuts out April, May and most of June from the NL race. The same two-plus months in which Lincecum won 11 of his games for the Giants, and Sabathia went 6-8 for the Indians. ‘ ‘ ‘ Yet Sabathia is getting the attention. And it’s Michael Phelps’ fault. ‘ ‘ ‘ Eight gold medals in one Olympics. Insane, right? Impossible. So is winning a Cy Young Award in nearly half a season. ‘ ‘ ‘ America wants to see more Phelpsian feats. Who wouldn’t? You can’t fault Phelps for being awesome. But he and Usain Bolt and Tiger Woods and the like have all raised America’s expectations to the point of everyday greatness becoming ho-hum. ‘ ‘ ‘ You can’t just win one gold medal anymore. You must win eight. You can’t just be the fastest man in the world. You must be the fastest man ever. And you can’t just win the U.S. Open. You have to win it injured. ‘ ‘ ‘ So, in the public eye, you can’t just win a Cy Young by steadily putting up numbers all year like Lincecum. People want to see the impossible, just to say they saw it. They want to see CC win the Cy Young. ‘ ‘ ‘ Now I want to see some rapid fire! ‘mdash; What do the following three Pitt football games have in common: Notre Dame in 2005, Connecticut last season and Bowling Green last week? Yes, all embarrassing losses for Pitt … but also all games to which I wore my Dan Marino throwback. I don’t want to believe it, but I think my jersey is unlucky. -‘mdash; Actually, those games are the only ones I’ve gone to in my time at Pitt as a fan and not as a member of the media. So maybe it’s just me. It usually is. ‘mdash; While we’re talking Pitt pigskin, how about this: It kind of worked for Jason Giambi for a few games, so maybe it’s time Wanny shaved the ‘stache … or started throwing the ball downfield in the first three quarters. Well, we don’t want to get too crazy. ‘mdash; There’s nothing a fantasy football manager loves more than talking about his team. There’s also nothing a fantasy manager hates more than hearing other people talk about their teams. Oh? You just picked up Justin Fargas on waivers? Wha? He scored nine whole points this week? Oh, you should totally win your league. I wish my team was as awesome as yours. Pause. NOT! ‘mdash; In light of the Sabathia one-hitter controversy in a game he pitched against the Pirates last week, I’d like to appeal my seven-inning, one-hitter thrown against the Mets in Pony League. But I can’t, so I’m just going to lie. ‘mdash; For heaven’s sake, Lo is not the problem. I don’t want to hear it. ‘mdash; This week’s Heisman Dark Horse: Kevin Craft. I could throw four picks. Maybe even five. ‘mdash; For all you kids taking Intro to Logic, here’s a deductive reasoning problem for you: ‘Pure’ nightclub in Las Vegas claims to be exclusive. I have been there. Is ‘Pure’ exclusive? E-mail Pat at pmitsch@gmail.com.