Sticker parties promote openness about sexuality

Leigha Smith stood on the front porch accepting donations and charging guests $1 if they… Leigha Smith stood on the front porch accepting donations and charging guests $1 if they wanted to drink. Just barely visible over her black shirt was a shiny blue sticker – which Smith wore to show that she liked men.

“Hey guys, I need a $1 each,” Smith said, turning to four men who were walking past her into the house.

“We’re not drinking,” one of them said, on their way through the front door.

“You promise?” she asked.

“No, we’re not drinking,” another said.

Smith sighed.

“They’re drinking,” she said, rolling her eyes as they passed. “Oh well, we don’t do these things for profit.”

The Sticker Star Co. – a Facebook group made up mostly of Pitt students, but not affiliated with the University – threw its bi-annual Sticker Star party last Friday.

The purpose of these parties is to bring people with different sexual orientations together in a comfortable environment where they will not be judged.

Former Pitt student Brian Andersen invented Sticker Star parties four years ago so that his guests could openly display their sexual orientation to everyone within eyesight by placing different colored star stickers somewhere on themselves.

Now, the parties are helping students become more open about their sexuality.

“People definitely seem to be a lot more open at these parties,” Andersen said. “It’s more of a comfortable environment.”

While Sticker Star parties are not common knowledge on Pitt’s campus, they have been held once a semester since 2002. Currently, 81 people have joined the Sticker Star Co. online.

The idea of Sticker Star parties started in Andersen’s sophomore year. After throwing a “regular” party at a friend’s apartment, Andersen realized that he had a very sexually and ethnically diverse group of friends who needed something to help them interact with each other.

“It was awkward at first,” said Andersen, who added that some of his friends couldn’t tell other people’s sexual orientations. “So we decided we needed to devise a labeling system so that everyone wouldn’t get unwanted advances. And it’s kicked off ever since.”

The labeling system is made up of colored star stickers – the kind most people see in elementary school after getting a good grade on a spelling test.

Each color signifies a different sexuality: Red means you like women, blue means you like men, silver means you like both, green means if you get drunk enough you’ll kiss anything and gold means you are either in a relationship, asexual or just don’t want to be touched, according to the group’s Facebook page.

Pitt senior Gary DiNardo explained that people are not limited to just one sticker.

“You could have all the stars,” DiNardo said. “It would mean you are bisexual who gets really touchy-feely when you are drunk, but you are not looking for anything right now.”

DiNardo also understands that some people may not agree with the general idea of the party.

“There are people who feel that this is immoral,” DiNardo said. “I understand why people would feel that way based on some people’s morals.”

At Friday’s party, posters depicted the party’s rules and sticker booklets lined the walls of the house. After coming inside, the guests could take as many stickers of as many different colors as they wanted. Some people stuck them on the outsides of their clothing while others stuck them near the corners of their eyes.

“I’ve seen people stick them all over their face,” DiNardo said.

Mitch Shick, a guest at the party, felt that people became more open about themselves and their sexuality because of the non-judgmental environment.

He added that these parties allowed people with the same interests to have fun without feeling awkward.

“I feel like a lot of stuff is revealed at a Sticker Star party,” Shick said. “A lot of people will kind of come out.”

“At other parties you have to be like, ‘Are you gay or straight?'” Shick added. “There are a lot less awkward moments when you are you meeting people [at Sticker Star Parties].”

Shick’s friend Meghan O’Halloran agreed with him.

She said that Sticker Star parties were safer environments than many other places at Pitt.

“I feel on campus is a more judgmental place,” O’Halloran said. “It’s harder to do this on campus because [here] it’s posted on your face.”

In addition to trying to ease the awkwardness, the group’s most strongly enforced rule is “No means no.”

Many of the guests at the party said that someone would be immediately kicked out if they made any aggressive, unwanted advances on someone.

Some people who come to Sticker Star parties aren’t exactly aware of what the parties are about before they go.

Maureen Stehle – who has been to them in the past – feels that that could be a good thing.

“People who may not be aware of this culture all conglomerate,” Stehle said. “If they were homophobic, they aren’t as scared anymore.”

Sharawnda Smith said that although the parties are always non-judgmental, the main reason she comes is because she knows she will have a good time. And maybe learn something at the end of the night.

“Before I started coming, I was the typical Pittsburgh heterosexual girl who never hung out with people with other lifestyles,” she said. “Now I’m more accepting than I used to be and I don’t make snap judgments based on appearance.”