Sizes are becoming skewed

Picture this. You’re at your favorite clothing store ripping through the clearance rack when… Picture this. You’re at your favorite clothing store ripping through the clearance rack when you eye a cute pair of jeans. You instantly grab them hoping they’re in your size. As you flip over the top to reveal the tag, you notice they’re two sizes smaller than what you normally wear.

Feeling upset, you wonder if you can still wear them.

“So what if they’re too small? Maybe I can squeeze into them,” is what you recite as you advance to the nearest dressing room.

You try them on; they fit. Surprisingly, the jeans aren’t as small as you thought. But how can that be?

You’re positive you haven’t gone to the gym in a while, and you’re absolutely sure you haven’t lost a single ounce of weight. So does the clothing tag say you’re suddenly smaller than the size you’ve been wearing for eons?

Sound familiar?

Introduce yourself to the size conspiracy, where designers are famous for generous clothing size allowances. Today, our size 6 is comparable to our mothers’ and grandmothers’ size 9. Go figure.

If you ever have the chance, stop into a vintage clothing store, and you’ll notice their sizes are generally four to six sizes smaller than our sizes today.

But why the sudden changes in sizes? Well, we all know that America is one of the most overweight countries in the world. With junk food being our staple, Americans are opting for fast food instead of wholesome, nutritious foods.

The result — overweight Americans working hard to get back to that small shape they were years ago.

But instead of retailers increasing the sizing of their clothing to accommodate the growing number of large Americans, they put smaller size labels on larger clothing. They assume, if shoppers feel good about themselves, they’ll spend more money. You know the cycle; there’s no need to explain.

As a result, sizes vary from designer to designer, meaning it’s almost a necessity to try clothing on.

If you ask me, the new sizing of clothing seems a little sketchy. How dare stores fool women into thinking they can shimmy their way into a size 2, when in actuality the old size 2 wouldn’t even cover their left thigh.

All I know is, I’ve been sized out along with thousands of other skinny people. Sadly, we can no longer go into the GAP and purchase their smallest pair of jeans — they won’t fit. That size 0-2 that we used to wear is now more like a 3-4.

For me, it’s never because I’m too tall and the pants are too short; nor is it because I’m too short and the pants are too long. It’s simply because retailers don’t recognize my petite physique anymore. Supposedly, American women are far larger than someone my size.

Well, surprise — skinny people exist, and we want our sizes back.

You can’t fault us for being small. We drink and eat most people under the table like nobody’s business. It’s our high metabolisms that keep us from gaining any weight.

So to all you averaged sized people who are welcoming the words “petite,” “regular,” and my favorite, “misses,” I sure hope you’re happy.

Have fun embracing the deception from retailers, while we skinny people suffer with our last resort — shopping in the children’s department.

If you’re skinny like Deena and want to complain about not being able to wear GAP jeans, e-mail her at dmc18@pitt.edu with your comments.