Engineers sell their bodies for science

The bass thumped and reverberated through the auditorium. Sisqo’s “How Many Licks?”… The bass thumped and reverberated through the auditorium. Sisqo’s “How Many Licks?” collided with roars from a rowdy crowd. The next item was up for bid, and this one’s exaggerated, slinky movements and bra-throwing antics elicited many hoots and hollers from the audience.

At the engineering student date auction last Thursday, the highest bidders not only gained cheers of admiration from other spectators, but paid as much as $180 for the company of the auctionees.

The annual event was one in a series of fundraisers for “E-Week,” a nationwide event for engineering students. At Pitt, celebration of the week includes competitions in everything from the game “Pittopoly” to building floats.

Although the event raised just less than $1,000, it did not surpass the sums raised in previous years, which amounted to about $1,500 to $2,000 in 2002 and 2003.

Master of ceremonies Dana Slone said that the event was not a success, and she attributed the lower funds to a general lack of interest and advertising. In past years, the event has filled the Benedum auditorium and produced bids as high as $220.

Although there were lower bids and fewer bidders than in previous years, there was no shortage of unbridled sexual energy from audience members.

“Come on, guys, think with your crotch,” shouted a student in the front row.

Generally, exposed skin received higher bids. One contestant teasingly lifted her denim miniskirt, revealing her black, boy-cut underwear. Gasps from wide-eyed audience members ensued. Going, going, gone, for $95.

Nate Phillips, an auctionee and the president of Pitt’s Engineering Student Council, performed the tighty-whitey and sock routine from “Risky Business”. He slid onto the stage wearing a peach-colored, button-down shirt and aviator sunglasses, then danced to Bob Seger’s “Old Time Rock ‘ Roll.” Going, going, gone, for $35.

In addition to the Tom Cruise look-alike, an Enrique Iglesias impostor joined the mayhem, sporting the mole and beanie hat that Jimmy Fallon donned in parody at last year’s MTV Video Music Awards. To add his own twist on Enrique, Mike Hamidi flexed and flaunted his pectorals and performed several push-ups. Going, going, gone, for $30.

Hamidi, in his fourth year participating in the student auction, was disappointed. Last year, he said he sold for $85. As he spoke, a bra soared into the audience. Hamidi looked to his left and saw a student with the bra wrapped around his head.

A pair of blonde twins, Kim and Carly Patterson, brought on an intense wave of audience reactions with their gyrating pelvises and butts. When the blonde with black stilettos began to grind with her sister, the bids rapidly increased. As a package deal, they went for $180 — the highest bid of the night.