The Real Pitt

You?ve heard of Thirsty Thursday ? but Wasted Wednesday?

Yes, Wasted Wednesday. On this… You?ve heard of Thirsty Thursday ? but Wasted Wednesday?

Yes, Wasted Wednesday. On this hump day, the boys of Bouquet are, for the most part, abandoning homework and indulging in the finer things in life.

?Uncle Jager, he?s always been good to me,? says Jimi, referring to his alcohol of choice, Jagermeister.

The guys aren?t alone on this spring-like evening. If they were dynamic leading actors in a Hollywood blockbuster, they?d surely have a capable cast of supporting actors.

First, enter the ladies of the evening: Gina, who unfortunately has a test early the following morning, and Jenni, a vibrant woman who seems to want nothing more than to unwind after a hard day of classes.

Later in the evening, Chris, affectionately dubbed ?Happy Bear? by the jovial group, and Joe, who has just finished his shift at Qdoba, swing by to join in the festivities.

As the night progresses, conversations turn interesting. Aaron mentions how a friend of his ?saw midgets? dancing on a bar in the South Side.

Next topic, please.

Chad enters the apartment shortly thereafter to someone?s cry of ?You gotta drink!?

?I gotta do a lab report!? says Chad, who recently turned 21.

Much to the approval of the group, Chad decides he?ll indulge in a glass of Monterey Riesling white wine. But there?s a problem ? the wine?s half frozen.

Aaron?s earlier question of: ?Jimi, did you take Chad?s wine out of the freezer?? resounds between the guys.

Oops.

?We?re gonna let this sit for a while. I?ll go work on my lab report,? Chad says, retreating to his room.

Much like a sitcom, Bob enters right after Chad leaves the living room. He?s been busy with the fraternity he is pledging.

Bob has barely had time to settle in when Jimi asks, ?Bob, wanna play 40 pong??

?Do I wanna play 40 pong? No,? Bob replies.

Instead, he heats up some leftover ravioli for a late night snack.

?Yo, whose bread is this?? asks Bob, while he searches for more food in the refrigerator.

?It?s Chad?s. Go ahead and eat it,? Aaron replies.

With all the talk of food, Jimi begins to boast about his cooking skills. He says that a few days ago, he made jambalaya for the group. Desert, too.

?You?re Betty Crocker,? Gina and Jenni croon.

As the night wears on, Gina leaves, and Chris and Joe arrive. Seems with the amount of traffic going through the apartment, the front door should be replaced with a turnstile and manned by a cigarette smoking, ticket-taking, mulleted carnie.

Chris begins to eat spoonfuls of peanut butter, so he ?can drink more,? while a disgusted Jenni looks on. Joe talks about his beloved Boston Red Sox while Aaron, a fan of the Oakland A?s ? the team Boston eliminated in the American League Divisional Series ? slouches into the couch, displeased.

As the peanut butter runs out and the pain of playoff eliminations slip their minds, Aaron, Bob, Chad and Jimi decide what to do next.

Bob?s channel surfing, trying to find something worth watching this late. Aaron?s contemplating going to sleep. Chad has emerged from his room and is now sipping on his thawed-out wine while he finishes off the leftovers of his bloomin? onion from the Outback Steakhouse.

And Jimi is still drinking his 40.

?I?m doin? a good job,? he says.

Ahh, the joys of Wasted Wednesday.