Palahniuk reads story, people faint

They came, they heard, they threw up.

So it was, as Chuck Palahniuk read his twisted brand… They came, they heard, they threw up.

So it was, as Chuck Palahniuk read his twisted brand of fiction to an adoring and disgusted crowd on Tuesday, a crowd who ate it up almost as fast as they spewed it out.

Palahniuk, whose novel “Fight Club” sparked the Hollywood film of the same name while gaining him critical acclaim and a cult following, was received with a welcome that Britney Spears would have found impressive. Before the reading, lines for his autograph snaked around the 7th floor lobby of Alumni Hall, causing a 30-minute wait for the devoted. At the same time, eager fans began saving seats a half hour before the reading. As 8:30 neared, late-comers secured standing positions along the walls of the auditorium, or sat cross-legged at the foot of the stage.

“He’s like the new generation’s Kurt Vonnegut,” said Jared Kistler, a sophomore who made the hike from Duquesne University to hear the reading, adding that Palahniuk’s unique blend of dark humor, social consciousness and unabashed raunchiness makes him a popular author among today’s youth.

Then he started reading.

And the mood quickly changed from giddy excitement to collective shock, as Palahniuk launched into the unpublished short story “Guts.” As he read his tale of masturbation, intestines and pool filters (use your imagination) in an unwavering voice, audience members groaned, squirmed and laughed nervously at the subject matter.

At least four people fainted. Pitt police were on hand to help, presumably tipped about the likelihood of it happening.

Following “Guts,” Palahniuk spilled his own, candidly fielding a diverse array of questions about success, writing and life, while awarding questioners prizes he pulled from a large cardboard box.

Palahniuk briefly discussed the blockbuster success of the movie version of “Fight Club”, saying that the best part about it was that it allowed him to quit his day job.

He also touched on the state of the world, a world he believes is getting worse, as people maintain an inability to cope with violent realities, like death.

As with the rest of his work, though, Palahniuk laced his unapologetic realism with humor.

“My writing has to be as much fun as going to parties, taking drugs or jacking off,” he said, in regards to the personal standards he sets for his own work.

Michael Croland, Carnegie Mellon University junior and proud recipient of a large, plastic baby bottle from Palahniuk’s box of prizes, planned to read more of his work after hearing “Guts.”

“This night definitely introduced me to his work and made me respect him more,” he said, adding that he loved the disgusting nature of the story.

“I think he did an excellent job of making the appalling, commercial,” he said.