Get naked and run around

Mark Sunday’s date down in your book of history. On June 15, 2003, men and women reached… Mark Sunday’s date down in your book of history. On June 15, 2003, men and women reached another level of equality, and it took place at golf’s U.S. Open.

No, Annika Sorenstam didn’t compete in another PGA event.

As eventual champion Jim Furyk prepared for a putt on the 11th hole, a woman left the stands and approached the golfer with two roses. That’s nice, you might say, but what does that have to do with equality? That’s just like those women who run onto baseball fields to give players a smooch on the check.

Except there was something noticeably different about this woman, especially to the male population in attendance. With that said, we’ve narrowed it down to knowing: She didn’t have a new pair of shoes and she didn’t just get her hair done.

It wasn’t so much what was different about her; it was more like what was missing.

Yes, sports fans, it was a female streaker.

For the first time in recent memory, a woman bared all – well, actually just her breasts – and interrupted a professional sporting event.

To that, I have only two things to say: I can’t believe I just used the word “breasts” in a sports column, and it’s about freaking time.

For years, we’ve had to deal with middle-aged men, parading around in nothing but their shoes while you-know-what flops around the field. Finally, we get to see some – wait.

I mean, um, shame on her. Running around without a top. I hope the police at the U.S. Open arrested her on the spot and took her to jail. Hmm – that means they would have had to use handcuffs.

Anyway, while some will say what the woman did was wrong, I think the greater issue is the way Furyk responded.

”I was definitely caught off guard,” he said afterward. “I just wanted to back off from the situation and get back to playing golf.”

Are you kidding me? Get back to playing golf?

If a topless woman comes out of nowhere and runs toward me, the last thing on my mind is whether or not I’m going to make the putt. In fact, I probably wouldn’t be thinking about much of anything at that point.

All right, so his wife was watching from the stands, but he could have at least accepted the roses from his fan. Instead, she probably had to give them to some grubby police officer who kept her from putting her top back on so he could stare at her goods while drooling all over himself.

But back to the issue at hand – we need more female streakers.

Title IX brought a new, albeit not nearly perfect, form of equality to sports. There are now professional women’s sports leagues in basketball, soccer and football. Women have also participated with men in minor league hockey and baseball, along with professional golf.

It is now time to bring streaking to the same level. Men and women could even pair up for some synchronized streaking, and judges could award points, or bail bonds, for style.

Just don’t ask me to be the first one to do it.