It’s real – really real

Reality television started out innocently enough: In 1992 MTV picked seven strangers to live… Reality television started out innocently enough: In 1992 MTV picked seven strangers to live in a New York loft to find out what happens when people stop being polite and start being real. In the more than 10 years since then, the medium of television itself has been altered by the many, many new reality shows that have come and gone.

“Road Rules” followed soon after “Real World,” and then reality television came to a halt for a while. Sure, the “Real World/Road Rules Challenges” popped up here and there, but the real bombardment started with 2000’s “Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire?”

Darva Conger and Rick Rockwell were married after knowing each other for only moments, and they despised each other so much that a chaperone accompanied them on their honeymoon and a divorce followed shortly. She went on to pose for Playboy; he began a dry stand-up comedy career.

Love was further turned into a game with shows like MTV’s “Dismissed;” the WB’s “elimiDATE” and “Blind Date;” FOX’s “Temptation Island;” and ABC’s “The Bachelor” and now “The Bachelorette.” Competing for $1 million was as easy as “Big Brother,” “The Mole” and “Survivor,” or as difficult as talking out questions and possible answers with Regis Philbin. “Fear Factor” put people face to face with their greatest fears for a monetary prize. Getting talent discovered was as easy as making it through VH1’s “Bands on the Run,” the WB’s “Popstars” and FOX’s “American Idol.” Hell, even the Disney Channel got into reality television with its teen reality show, “Bug Juice.” It makes one wonder what new ways will people be able to humiliate themselves with on television.

Wonder no more, because a whole new crop of reality television is about to be reaped.

UPN’s “America’s Next Top Model” will be hosted by supermodel Tyra Banks. It’s sort of like the anorexic’s version of “American Idol:” Ten semi-finalists will live in a luxurious pad in New York and learn the ins and outs of modeling, while being eliminated one by one.

FOX brings us “Man vs. Beast,” where humans will be pitted against non-humans to perform various tasks. The Jan. 15 premiere focused on 44 “little people” and an 8,800-pound elephant – each pulling a DC-10 airplane. Who or whatever pulls the airplane 75 feet the quickest wins the competition. In a future episode, the world record holder for eating the most hot dogs, Takeiu Kobayashi, will have an eat-off against a 1,000-pound Kodiak bear.

Not satisfied with just one idol, FOX premiered “American Idol 2” last week. Thirty-two brave souls made it through the grueling auditions to vie for the chance to be America’s next man-made superstar. Apparently Kelly Clarkson wasn’t enough.

A battle of wits unfolds Monday nights at 9 p.m. on NBC’s “Dog Eat Dog,” the show where six contestants use their seamiest knowledge about each contestant against each other through trivia, stunts and dares to win a mere $25,000.

With all of this reality television featuring everyday people, we might actually begin to miss celebrities in the spotlight. Evidently the celebrities miss being in the spotlight, too. For them, ABC has “Celebrity Mole: Hawaii.” It’s just like the original “Mole,” except this one was filmed in Hawaii with has-beens such as Stephen Baldwin, Corbin Bernsen, Kathy Griffin, Kim Coles, Michael Boatman, Erik von Detten and Frederique as the contestants. The real cliffhanger here may not be who wins the show, but if the $250,000 prize will go to charity or to pay off the winner’s debts.

It isn’t fair to keep hooking random Joes up with each other. Celebrities need love, too. E! has solved this dilemma with its show, “Star Dates,” showing Sundays at 10:30 p.m. The deal is a random Joe gets to go out on a date with someone famous. So far, Kim Fields, Butch Patrick, Dustin Diamond and 85-year-old Phyllis Diller have given romance a chance. Watching this is entertaining because there is sure to be a debate amongst friends to follow – who is more pathetic: the washed-up has-been stooping to our mediocre level for a date, or a regular person actually thinking he or she has a chance with an ex-sitcom star?

Speaking of random Joes … FOX’s newest sleaze-fest “Joe Millionaire” airs Mondays at 9 p.m. The idea is the same as that of “The Bachelor,” except these ladies swooning over Joe and his money only have Joe to swoon over – he only rakes in $19,000 a year.

These are only a few of the intelligence-insulting reality programs out now. Check your listings because new reality shows pop up all the time.