Categories: EditorialsOpinions

Editorial: Casual Fridays

Sticky situation

On Tuesday, Seattle began to remove a Hubba-Bubba lot of gum from a historic “gum wall” near Pike Place Market. Foregoing the peanut butter hack, the hired contractor, Cascadian Building Maintenance, used steam cleaners to melt the gum off the wall. Kelly Foster, the contractor’s general manager, didn’t want to burst anyone’s bubble. Once the rainbow of colors started attracting a herd of gnawing rats, however, the Market knew it had a Tutti Frutti problem on its hands. It’s not likely that the cleaning will stick — people have grown fond of the gum wall.

Loco motives

Darius McCollum is a true trainwreck. On Wednesday, cops arrested the repeat train-thieving offender for disorderly conducting a Greyhound bus he stole from a New York Port Authority bus terminal. McCollum’s life started veering onto the wrong track at the age of 15, when he illegally piloted a subway train. Since then, McCollum has been arrested for more than two dozen transit arrests. This time, however, he is hoping to take the express train out of jail. McCollum plans to get proper training for a job and a therapist to get his e-steam puffing again.

Crappy environment

In Russia, you can flush your paycheck down the toilet and ease that runny panic with a visit to the Crazy Toilet Cafe. The restaurant is the number one toilet themed restaurant in the world, but be careful about ordering the number two special. The restaurant features toilet seats, toilet shaped dishes and fecal decor. Here’s hoping the meal is worth the royal flush and leaves you sufficiently pooped out.

Move over, Fido

On Tuesday, a Kentucky woman travelled from one doghouse to another. After officers noticed that the license plate on the car that Myranda Skinner was driving had been reported stolen, Skinner and her accomplice, Bryan Wells, led cops on a dog chase. The cop was right to call out Skinner’s subpar driving as the suspects ended up crashing through a gate at a golf course. Once on foot, Skinner ran into a doghouse. She was in for a ruff awakening when a K-9 unit discovered her a short time later. Skinner is requesting a mulligan on the day.

Jailhouse croc

On Monday, Indonesia toyed with the idea of building a real-life villain’s lair when its  anti-drug agency proposed building a prison on an island guarded by crocodiles. If anti-drugs chief Budi Waseso has his way, prisoners who don’t want to be caught in the jaws of the law will be wise and stay in jail. Only the true “Crocodile Dundees” have any hope of escaping this prison. It looks like this prison is about to be swamped with new guards — we hope they have the prisoners to meet the new demand.

opinionsdesk

Share
Published by
opinionsdesk

Recent Posts

Pitt men’s basketball looks to soar back into win column against LouisvillePitt men’s basketball looks to soar back into win column against Louisville

Pitt men’s basketball looks to soar back into win column against Louisville

On Saturday, Pitt men’s basketball (12-3, ACC 3-1) hosts Louisville (11-5, ACC 4-1) at noon…

23 hours ago
Opinion | 2024/25: A year for the booksOpinion | 2024/25: A year for the books

Opinion | 2024/25: A year for the books

Few trends are more popular at the start of a new year than looking at…

1 day ago
New app ParkZen aims to fix lack of parking on campus New app ParkZen aims to fix lack of parking on campus 

New app ParkZen aims to fix lack of parking on campus 

On Dec. 15, Pitt released ParkZen, an app for Pitt community members that allows users…

1 day ago

Police blotter: Jan. 1 – Jan. 8

Pitt Police reported the theft of salt at College Garden Departments, harassment at The Eatery…

1 day ago

New mid-week start to classes brings irritation and ambivalence from students 

Students express their feelings, and many frustrations, about the new finals schedule which landed the…

1 day ago

Review | Hip Hop’s King caps off historic 2024 with ‘GNX’

Kendrick Lamar has been a longtime pioneer of the rap scene, holding to the nickname…

1 day ago