Over the weekend, film director Roman Polanski was arrested for having non-consensual sex with a… Over the weekend, film director Roman Polanski was arrested for having non-consensual sex with a 13-year-old girl back in 1977.

After reading this, I couldn’t help but think about the situation in sports terms and wonder what athletes I would like to see get arrested for having sex with 13-year-olds. Well, here’s my list:

No, just kidding.

But seriously, in regard to professional athletics, what unsolved sports mysteries or open-ended questions would I like to see resolved? It’s a good thing you asked, since I just so happen to have such a list compiled.

First off: Was Michael Jordan suspended by NBA Commissioner David Stern after the 1993 season? The long-standing rumor is that Jordan was suspended for his gambling problems, but Stern allowed him to save face by “retiring.”

I want to see this one resolved because if it turns out this was true, it would add to Stern’s legacy as a crazy despot of basketball. In fact, let’s just knock out some of the rumors about Stern right now.

Many think he rigged the 1985 NBA Draft lottery so the Knicks would get the first pick and select Patrick Ewing. Some think he organized a trade two years ago to get the Lakers’ Pau Gasol to restore the once great Lakers-Celtics rivalry. Referee Tim Donaghy, who bet on games he officiated and is now in jail for allegedly violating his probation, claimed Stern told officials to fix games during the 2006 play-offs and not to call fouls on star players.

Fixing games doesn’t bother me. Telling officials not to call fouls on star players is just smart planning. But suspending the greatest player in the history of your sport for two years when he’s only 30 years old and has led his team to the last three NBA titles? That’s a thing of beauty.

Secondly: Did former New York Met Kevin Mitchell cut the head off of his girlfriend’s cat? In his 1999 autobiography, Mitchell’s former teammate Dwight Gooden said he went to Mitchell’s apartment and saw an incredibly angry Mitchell cutting the head off his girlfriend’s cat. In a book about the 1986 Mets by Jeff Pearlman, Mitchell vehemently denied the story. I really want to know if Mitchell cut the head off that cat because, well, because it’s a story about him cutting the head off a cat and that’s just weird.

Also: Did a certain loud-mouthed pitcher from the 2004 Red Sox really give an underage girl Quaaludes at Jack Nicholson’s house and sleep with her? Oh, wait, no. That was Roman Polanski. Sorry.

Next, did Bobby Thomson of the then-New York Giants know what pitch was coming from the Dodgers’ Ralph Branca when Thompson hit his famous home run to win the 1951 National League pennant? The homer capped off an improbable run by the Giants, who erased a 13.5 game deficit in less than a month. The home run, along with announcer Russ Hodges’ screaming, “The Giants win the pennant! The Giants win the pennant!” is one of baseball’s most iconic moments. But is it tarnished?

In 2001, the Wall Street Journal published an article in which Giants players from that year — Monte Irvin, catcher Sal Yvars and pitcher Al Gettel— admitted that the team stole signs from the opposing teams’ catchers and relayed them to Giants hitters so that they knew what pitch to expect.

The Giants supposedly had a coach in the Giants’ clubhouse in centerfield using binoculars to look at the catcher’s signs. The coach would then signal players in the bullpen with a buzzer system, with one buzz meaning fastball and two meaning a breaking pitch. A player in the bullpen would toss a ball in the air to signal fastball, or not toss a ball to say a breaking ball was coming.

While some players have admitted doing it, Thomson said he didn’t know what pitch was coming and hasn’t budged from that stance.

Is Kareem Abdul-Jabbaractually two men in a 7-foot-2-inch costume? A little known rumor is that two men — Kareem Abdul and Kareem Jabbar— with decent basketball abilities decided if they joined forces they could dominate the sport. This one might have been made up like 10 seconds ago, but has anyone proven this isn’t true?

Did Alex Rodriguez really try to sleep with Jose Canseco’s wife? Canseco claims A-Rod did, but A-Rod denies it. Canseco has been right about pretty much everything he’s claimed in the past, yet seems very sleazy. He might have twisted some compliments from Rodriguez into a full-on crush.

Mainly I want to know if this is true because my theory is the only reason Canseco wrote his two books about the rampant steroid use in baseball is to get back at A-Rod. He inadvertently blew open the biggest sports story in the past decade just because A-Rod tried to sleep with his wife. It’s quite possible that Jessica Canseco saved baseball.