With the opening weekend of the NFL season set to begin on Wednesday, it’s time for me to…With the opening weekend of the NFL season set to begin on Wednesday, it’s time for me to select the players I want to fail miserably this year.

For each of the last six or seven NFL seasons, I’ve done my best to take my fandom to a different level — one beyond fantasy drafts and childhood teams, hometown cheering and rational thinking.

You see, the joy I get out of the NFL comes from the people I get to root against. And last year, the gods answered my prayers in startling fashion.

My list of disliked players consisted of defensive tackle Albert Haynesworth (cut by the Pats midway through the season), quarterback Tony Romo (Cowboys missed the playoffs yet again), wide receiver DeSean Jackson (Eagles dreams turned to nightmares), every quarterback wearing a Bronco jersey (Tebow nearly ruined this for me, but then he got traded to the Jets) and Steelers linebacker James Harrison (Harrison had a pretty solid year, but he did miss four games — the most he’s ever missed in one season. We’ll call it a push).

So, without further adieu, here is my 2012 NFL hater primer:

Michael Vick, Philadelphia Eagles quarterback

As one of the most entertaining players to watch in the NFL and a one-of-a-kind athlete, Vick is electrifying. But he is also the quarterback for one of the most overrated, arrogant teams in the league.

The Eagles signed the injury-prone passer to an idiotic $100 million contract a couple years ago, and I’m going to continue to enjoy watching their investment dry up every time Vick gets hurt. It was dumb for the Eagles to invest so much into Vick in the past, and it’s still dumb now.

This franchise has gotten away with some bad decisions in the past, and it’s time one caught up with them for good.

Dez Bryant, Dallas Cowboys wide receiver

Not to get stuck in the NFC East, but there is a lot of material in this division.

Bryant has been the center of a lot of attention recently, mostly due to accusations that he had a physical altercation with his 37-year-old mother in July. Aside from that, his off-the-field issues have been seemingly minor, but the gargantuan size of Bryant’s ego makes it a surprise his head can fit through the door at the Cowboys’ facility each morning.

He is a commonality in the NFL these days — an arrogant, ridiculously talented, underachieving skill position player. His X factor? He’s a Cowboy, and he loves the attention.

Cowboys owner Jerry Jones — only days after acknowledging that Bryant was working under a set of rules off the field — denied the rules even existed to a Dallas radio station.

So, while the Cowboys try to wrangle in their young star receiver by treating him like a 16-year-old, I’ll get to watch the repercussions of his behavior as they unfold on the field.

Mark Sanchez, New York Jets quarterback

I honestly can’t believe this man is still a quarterback in the NFL.

Sanchez has had more success on the cover of GQ magazine than on the gridiron. And the NFL’s prima donna shows no sign of turning it around.

The Jets are coming off a preseason where they didn’t manage a single touchdown with their starting offense, but Sanchez did score off the field — with famed actress Eva Longoria.

According to Pro-football-reference.com, Sanchez makes $14.75 million a year and is now dating Longoria, all while being mediocre at his job.

Do I have to say anything else? (As an added bonus, when Sanchez likely gets benched a few weeks into the season, we’ll get to watch the circus that is Tim Tebow, only this time in New York City. I get excited just thinking about it).

Shaun Suisham, Pittsburgh Steelers kicker

Picking on an NFL placekicker seems too easy, but Suisham isn’t your typical kicker.

He started his career with a short stint in Dallas before signing with the Washington Redskins and giving my favorite team four years of continuous disappointment as he repeatedly missed crucial field goals.

On Dec. 6, 2009, Suisham missed a 23-yard field goal that would have sealed a win against the undefeated New Orleans Saints.

Suisham’s miss, a kick that I could hit if you cleated me up right now, sent the game to overtime, where the Saints won, 33-30.

Then he re-signed with the Cowboys and gave them another season of patchiness before they released him to be picked up again by the Steelers. How is he still a starter in the NFL? I’m not privileged enough to have the answer, although some credit should go to former Steelers kicker Jeff Reed and his inability to stay out of trouble in Pittsburgh.

Regardless, I’m tired of hearing and seeing Suisham’s name unless it’s on the free agent wire.

Andrew Luck, Indianapolis Colts quarterback

What has a well-behaved, honest, talented and humble rookie done to make this list?

Well, nothing in particular, but Luck is a casualty of war. You see, Luck is a small piece in a bigger picture of NFL under-appreciation. And if he can be a pawn to make a point, so be it.

Let me explain.

Last season, the Colts went 1-15 without star quarterback Peyton Manning, who sat out the year with a neck injury. And then, as if Manning hadn’t served the previously unknown city of Indianapolis with years of loyalty, freakish talent and an inexplicable knack to win, the Colts shipped him out in favor of a new guy for “the future.”

Without actually saying it, the Colts’ management showed it felt Manning’s career had reached its end — that he wasn’t worth the risk after he had put his body on the line for their team for more than a decade.

They couldn’t do him the courtesy of a comeback year, one in which he could have tutored the best quarterback to come out of college since, well, Manning himself.

So, sorry Luck, but I want Manning to succeed and you to fail.

That way, the Colts’ management can realize what an idiotic decision they’ve made.

Contact Isaac at [email protected].