Once upon a time, when I was still young and naive, I believed that Abercrombie & Fitch was… Once upon a time, when I was still young and naive, I believed that Abercrombie & Fitch was the crème de la crème and that Limited Too was a guest at Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week.

During my own personal dark ages, I was stricken with the black plague of clothing. I was addicted to sweatpants. I wore them to the grocery store, the mall and even to school underneath my regulation khaki skort.

But one day, my mom, Rebecca, sat me down and staged an intervention. Not unlike the subjects of the A&E show of the same name, I felt bombarded, ambushed and hurt. So I did what I always used to do when I was upset. I went upstairs and sat in the back of my mom’s closet.

As I buried my head in the vintage Valentino silk and the handiwork of Dolce&Gabbana, I felt inspired. Suddenly, my sweatpants seemed inferior and insulting in comparison. Then and there, I made a promise to myself and to my smartly dressed mother that my sweatpants would never again see the light of day.

When I came to college, I realized that there were many people who shared my past affliction. When I look around the library on an average day, there are few items more prominent in their abundance than open laptops, anxious faces and an endless array of textbooks. But sweatpants seem to rival even these academic necessities in prevalence.

No matter whether I look left, right, up or down, I’m surrounded by oversized jogging suits, unflattering layers of cotton and frumpy excuses for clothing. You can call them whatever you want, but it won’t excuse their crimes of fashion.

Sweatpants are what I like to call “the devil’s fabric.” They seem harmless at first, but at second glance, their true colors are exposed. If you’re not careful, sweatpants will seduce you with their promises of comfort and practicality, just like the forbidden fruit seduced Eve.

If you give in to the temptation, you’re destined for a grim fate. Sweats create the illusion that you don’t care about your appearance. As a result, the look implies that you’re lazy and don’t care to dress presentably. Even if you’ve showered, blown out your hair and put on your full face, pairing your cosmetics with sweatpants won’t do you any good. The look will always appear sloppy and thrown together.

I’m not advocating that students dress up every single day. I realize a college student’s life is both hectic and unpredictable, and sweatpants offer an element of practicality that more formal clothing seems to lack.

But I’ve found my happy medium — you can too. I’m always on the move, —running to the library or late for a deadline — so I knew I had to find a fashionable alternative to sweatpants.

If sweatpants are the evil stepmother, then yoga pants are Cinderella. The latter are comfortable, practical and flattering on just about everyone. Furthermore, they’re versatile. Whether you’re on your way to yoga class, the library or a two and a half-hour-long lecture, yoga pants can be your go-to comfort piece. I urge you to get acquainted with a good pair of yoga pants. Try them on, break them in and friend them on Facebook, because they will soon become one of your best friends.

So be sure to remember my mother’s teachings. In the words of Rebecca, never pass up a good sale, get your Ph.D., don’t be a slut and side-step the sweatpants. Wise woman, that Rebecca.