Greer’s fond farewell

By Pitt News Staff

There we were, sitting in the ESPN workroom. There were five TVs blaring in the distance and a… There we were, sitting in the ESPN workroom. There were five TVs blaring in the distance and a funny looking fat man straight ahead. To my immediate right, The Pitt News sports editor, Pat Mitsch. To my immediate left, The Pitt News photo editor, Pete Madia.

In front of me, ESPN’s Jay Bilas in his boxer briefs.

Yeah. No lie. The seemingly 9-foot-tall college basketball analyst asked if he could change while we chatted. Despite our shocked eyes and parched throats, we gargled a unified “Why not?”

Moments later, he actually took his pants off. We couldn’t believe it.

By that time, fellow ESPN Game Day analysts Digger Phelps and Hubert Davis had trickled into the workroom.

Larger-than-life ESPN statistician Howie Schwab had raided the buffet and dug into his pile of food.

The room abuzz around us, we Pitt Newsers were speechless. We looked away. Providence and Louisville were battling through another Big East slugfest. Schwab said something about how good Louisville was. Phelps made a comment about the buffet and Hubert Davis laughed.

But we couldn’t seem to shake the sheer weirdness of the situation. We were simply in awe.

Then Rece Davis, the host of Game Day, strolled in. He looked at us and smiled.

“Oh, Bilas,” he said, grinning ear to ear. “Always dropping drawers for someone and never leaving anyone unsatisfied. These guys are going to break out their cell phones and put this on YouTube.”

The comment shattered the silence and had everyone in stitches. It’s a story I’ll tell my kids and grandkids. And it’s the one thing I’ll remember more than anything else from my time as a writer and editor at The Pitt News.

There are many things I’ve discovered about sports and life while I’ve worked for The Pitt News.

There are many things I’ve loved about it and a few things I didn’t love so much.

There are many things I’ll forget from my time with The Pitt News.

But sitting courtside at two Big East tournaments in New York City’s Madison Square Garden and three NCAA tournaments will never escape this spotty memory of mine.

Neither will rubbing elbows with national columnists Jay Mariotti and Jim Armstrong or college basketball legends Dick Vitale and Bill Raftery.

And neither will the fantastic relationships I’ve formed with some of my coworkers and good buddies.

What would a goodbye column be without the rapid fire?

Let’s hit it one last time:

– Pitt football looked great in the Blue-Gold game on Saturday, Roc. A lot better than last year, that’s for sure. This is a team that should be ranked on the fringe of the Top 25 and probably make a bowl game. Great timing, guys.

– As Pat Mitsch puts it, there is no bigger character than Dave Wannstedt. You can’t create a fictional character like that.

– TRIVIA: I’ll give you a hearty pat on the back, Roc, if you can tell me who was the last person to win the Outland Trophy honoring the nation’s best interior lineman in college football.

– Did you know John McCain is 5 foot 7? Hillary Clinton could post him up.

– After graduation, I’m off to start researching my “Jump to Conclusions” mat. Should be hitting stores next fall.

– This degree will do me no good, Chancellor Nordenberg. None.

– Pitt basketball is looking at some pretty talented high school juniors. If Jamie Dixon can nab just one of them, Pitt is in good shape.

– Thank God Lil’ Kim is out of jail.

– After exhaustive research, I’ve found that Mariah Carey is eligible for Social Security. I’ll pass on the whole touching-your-body thing, Mariah.

– I’m really glad Bret Michaels picked Ambre and not Daisy in the “Rock of Love II” finale. Daisy’s face looks like it is in entirely made of Botox. Gross.

– I’ll take the Celtics and Lakers in the NBA Finals, Roc. I like the Celtics in that matchup. We’ll call it a seven-game series. Here’s to hoping.

– And I’ll take the Sharks and Penguins in the Stanley Cup. What kind of guy would I be if I didn’t pick the Penguins in six?

– TRIVIA ANSWER: Mark May, legendary Pitt offensive lineman, won the Outland in 1980. Pitt’s Gus Mustakas is up for the award this year.

– DeJuan Blair is a good kid with a great head on his shoulders. Let’s hope he does things the right way, as he has so far, and stays all four years at Pitt. He’s the kind of guy you’ll see building youth centers and making a difference someday.

– Thanks to all the readers who regularly responded to my weekly – and inane – rapid-fire columns. Thanks to the athletics department for all the help over the past two years.

– And a special parting thought: A very special thanks to Pat Mitsch, Pete Madia and the rest of The Pitt News for making the past two and a half years fantastic. And thanks to Jena Broz for putting up with all of it.

– It’s been real, Pitt. Catch you on the flipside.