Don’t ask me why or how – it’s a long story involving pickup lines that I may touch upon in… Don’t ask me why or how – it’s a long story involving pickup lines that I may touch upon in another column – but I recently stumbled upon an online archive of old Civil War documents. It was a pretty sweet looking Web site, complete with links like “Download the Civil War Screensaver!” and “Constitution for a Provisional Government.” I sat in my chair for a while and stared thoughtfully – yes, I distinctly remember looking quite thoughtful – laboring between hitting the back button on the browser and actually reading through the site. The former would take me back on my quest to find the world’s best pickup line and on a path to relationship bliss, whereas the latter, of course, would elevate me to an entirely new dimension of dorkitude.

I chose to read the site