I remember recesses in elementary school – and all of the torment and agony that I endured… I remember recesses in elementary school – and all of the torment and agony that I endured through them for being a little on the pudgy side. And, I wasn’t just bordering on pleasantly plump; I was your perfect example of childhood obesity.

So when I lost the excess baggage of my youth, I took a vow to never gain it back ever again.

Flash forward seven years and so far I’ve succeeded. But the nightmares that come with this new college experience linger in my mind every time I so much as go to a cafeteria.

Most notably, I fear the lore that follows college first-timers known as the “Freshman 15,” and like thousands of other freshmen around the nation, I’m terrified that this epidemic will afflict me, and thus kick my self-esteem back down to the level it was in elementary school. Being in college for about two months now, I’ve noticed that some of my friends look a little rounder than they used to. But is it inevitable that our rite of passage into college comes with some additional padding around the waist?

Hell no. And it doesn’t have to be true for those with the late-night munchies and the weekend “carbo loaders” either (not that there is any underage beer-guzzlin’ afoot in college, of course).

Why do I assume this is true? I have two reasons.

The first is that universities actually use students’ hard-earned tuition money to research this sort of quandary. In a 2003 study at Cornell University, researchers found an average weight gain of 0.3 pounds per week for 60 first-semester freshmen (85 percent were women). While their study was skewed toward women, other studies have shown similar results.

Going on their logic, though, the average weight gain for a 30-week school year would be nine pounds – not quite as bad as 15, but still not great. The apparent reasons for this, according to Boyd Lyles, the National Medical Director for LA Weight Loss Centers, are stress, homesickness and late-night eating.

This brings me to the second reason that I don’t think we’re all destined from the onset to become city-dwelling sloths: discretion. While I also have friends who will hit up Dave ‘ Andy’s every time they pass by Atwood Street, most financially ailing students here shouldn’t follow suit, if only for lack of resources. And others without the typical monetary restraints shouldn’t frequent junk food joints on a multi-weekly basis if for no other reason than just because they know better.

In the same light, there’s a lot more partying in college. Beer happens. So do late nights at the “O.” But that doesn’t mean that you have to participate in “Messed-up Monday,” “Trashed Tuesday,” “Wasted Wednesday,” “Thirsty Thursday,” “F—ed-up Friday” and “S–t-faced Saturday.”

While the composition of beer (and many other alcoholic beverages) is mostly water, they still find some way of shoving roughly 150 calories into a 12-ounce can. And most companies don’t label the cans (or kegs, for that matter) with nutrition facts, making keg stands less worrisome, and also making it easier to become careless when downing eight or nine cans at a party.

While I blame it partly on the breweries for only following the minimum FDA requirements, I don’t think it would be right to sue beer companies for college students becoming fat. That would be just as stupid as a state suing car companies for destroying the ozone layer (oh wait, that’s actually happening).

We, as students, owe it to ourselves to come out of college better than we went into it. While having fantastic stories from the best keggers ever can, and should, be part of college, it shouldn’t be all we get out of college.

Jamie Peck, a writer for The Baltimore Sun, gave advice for beating the “Freshman 15” in a 2002 article. He recommended activities outside of academia, drinking plenty of water, eating three “square” meals a day, and just paying attention to physical vs. emotional hunger.

It’s pretty simple.

The “Freshman 15” isn’t guaranteed. It’s something you have to work toward attaining. Some see it as a badge of honor for downing a farm’s worth of hops and barley. Others earn it with their breathtaking courage and endurance in beating all of the realms of “World of Warcraft” in one sitting while inhaling $5 pizza.

Personally, I find the “Freshman 15” somewhat of a reminder of long ago when I looked a little bit like Jabba the Hutt. To me, that’s incentive enough to stay away from too much of the late-night munchies.

Feeling a little thick around the edges? E-mail Jacob for weight-loss tips at [email protected].