Imagine the following scenario: the Cleveland Browns are playing the Cincinnati Bengals at… Imagine the following scenario: the Cleveland Browns are playing the Cincinnati Bengals at Paul Brown Stadium in Cincinnati. The Bengals have the ball on the Browns’ 10-yard line. Carson Palmer lobs a soft pass toward the corner of the end zone. Chad Johnson bursts past his defender and gracefully reels in the toss for six points.

Now for the real entertainment.

The anticipation among the crowd is palpable. What will Chad do to celebrate this momentous achievement? Is there a sign hidden behind the goalpost? Maybe he’ll do his best Andre Agassi impression using only the football and a pylon. Or perhaps he’s planning another marriage proposal?

He rises to his feet, stares into the crowd and breaks into