In grade school, I remember being confused when we learned about the American Revolution…. In grade school, I remember being confused when we learned about the American Revolution. I never really understood how “taxation without representation” was relevant when we were paying lower taxes than people in England. And I could never figure out how five people dead in Boston constituted a massacre. Did the soldiers really just line up like that and shoot them? Anyway, it worked. People became inflamed and we had a revolution.

Yes, even in the beginning we loved our self-glorifying sensationalism. Times have changed. We’ve gone from righteous underdog to benevolent superpower. But we are who we are and nowhere in the world will you find people so ready to pronounce themselves as living in the greatest country on Earth. After all, we have freedom!

We have freedom to tell ourselves how noble we are and the desire to hear it from others. And in such a nation, is it any surprise that the private, capitalist media conglomerates have begun to cater to this fundamental fervor in the hearts of Americans? They just give us what we want.

So it should come as no surprise to learn that CNN, Fox, MTV and Comedy Central have all turned down ads for anti-war advocacy groups. Each station cited its own version of a “no biased ads” policy to justify the act. The policies must be ambiguous since MTV airs ads for the military and Fox News not only has soldiers doing station identification spots but also allowed Darryl Worley to play his pro-war song “Have You Forgotten?” on the air in its entirety. Oh, and last week 20,000 people marched on CNN’s Los Angeles headquarters to protest its pro-war bias coverage of the war. But you didn’t hear about that. There’s no room for dissent during coverage of Operation: Iraqi Freedom.

But the televised media isn’t the worst of it. For that, we need to look toward the airwaves and Clear Channel Communications. Clear Channel is the true winner of the “media conglomerate which has truly gone the extra mile to provide America with guilt free one-sided coverage of the war” award. Yes, Clear Channel, owner of 1,220 radio stations across the country, none of which play the Dixie Chicks – at least not anymore.

Clear Channel has surpassed the televised media’s dilettante practices of censorship and the simple slant. It has gone above and beyond, actually sponsoring at least 13 “Rally for America” demonstrations. Of course it didn’t directly sponsor them. The demonstrations were organized by the local stations independently. Just like each station chose individually to not play the same list of 158 “offensive” songs after Sept. 11.

Now, a lot of people are trying to tie Clear Channel’s actions directly to the President. According to The Village Voice, Tom Hicks, who’s a vice chair for Clear Channel, bought the Texas Rangers off of George W. several years ago for several millions of dollars. Apparently that fact is supposed to conjure up in our minds the image of Bush, Tenet and Hicks, all sitting together, drawing up blue prints on how to manipulate the American people.

But, come now, just because a conservative corporation does conservative things doesn’t mean they were told to do them by the president.

Besides, Clear Channel isn’t alone. According to Paul Krugman of The New York Times, Cumulus Media organized a demonstration where a tractor destroyed CDs, videos and tapes of those traitorous, commie-loving Dixie Chicks.

The truth of the matter is that these media outlets aren’t being manipulated by the government. They’re being manipulated by us. They’re just giving us what we want – 25,000 people showed up to Clear Channel’s rally in Atlanta.

So what happened to objectivity in the media? We’ve never had it – not during wartime.

This is Will Minton’s last column of the year. So tell him now of any questions, comments, insights or suggestions, or forever hold you piece. [email protected].