There’s an app for that

A gas station attendant was saved from a gunshot during an attempted robbery when the smartphone he had in his pocket stopped a bullet. A man had entered the gas station and ordered the attendant to open a safe. When the attendant was unable to do so, the robber ran, firing a shot at the attendant as he left the store. The attendant did not realize he had been shot until he removed the phone from his pocket. This is one tragedy averted; however, the real tragedy is that the attendant will now need to annoy his Facebook friends by creating a group begging for contact numbers. 

Rent-a-cat

The app service Uber added a special one-day-only product to their delivery list on Tuesday: kittens. For $20 users can purchase 15 minutes with a kitten, specially delivered along with cupcakes and an assortment of other Uber products. The service was only available in New York, Seattle and San Francisco. All kittens rented were also available for adoption and all money collected was donated to a local animal shelter. Hopefully a rent-a-cat office will open in Pittsburgh before finals week.

Augustus Gloop’s worst nightmare is realized

The town of Santa Adelia, Brazil, is being threatened by a river of hot caramel after a factory fire melted more than 30,000 tons of sugar into a sticky mess. So far, 20 residents have been moved from their houses and four people have been injured by the molten stream. Walls of dirt have been piled in front of houses in an effort to protect the structures from the caramel. Perhaps Santa Adelia should call some Oompa Loompas to clean up the mess. .