Upon exiting the library, students face an incredibly difficult decision — do they make the Odyssean 10-yard journey to the crosswalk in front of Lawrence Hall, or do they simply cross right there in front of Hillman with no protection against oncoming traffic?

We at The Pitt News say get the goobermint out of our crimes of convenience! Here are the top 10 places to jaywalk in Oakland.

Editor's Note: This is a satirical story.Shawna Rhodes was crossing Forbes Avenue between Litchfield Towers and David Lawrence Hall when a car traveling 30 mph in a 25 mph zone whooshed by her and clipped...