Take steps to avoid societal pressures to ‘get in shape’ this summer
July 16, 2012
Body image issues are nothing if not chronic, and though picking at our own flaws is already a… Body image issues are nothing if not chronic, and though picking at our own flaws is already a year-round occupation for most of us, things really tend to deteriorate in the summer.
After all, nothing feels less sexy than sweating through all of your clothes. Maybe you love the pool or beach, and you’re feeling the pressure to get a “bikini body.” Maybe you’re home for the summer and your parents are critical of your body, or trying to pressure you to fad diet with them. Maybe you normally hide your insecurities behind layers of baggy clothing, and find yourself dismayed now that the temperature passed 90 degrees and it’s basically too hot to justify wearing anything at all. Or maybe you feel intimidated by those occasional perfect days, when the breeze and temperature are just right and everyone around you seems to have stepped out of an episode of MTV’s “Beautiful People Doing Stuff” — that’s a real show, right? — especially in Schenley Plaza.
Believe me, I feel your pain. Although reading my column for this long has probably led you to assume that the writer is as sexy as she is insightful, I’m actually a string-beany mess of protruding bones and weirdly dark body hair rivaled only by most boys in the midst of puberty — and my skin is only marginally better.
While few people are able to banish the body blues altogether — and I’m not one of those few — there are some tricks that can help.
We’re all media-literate enough to know that advertisements aim to make us feel crappy about ourselves so we’ll buy more products, but that doesn’t stop them from working. So, I’d suggest that if you’re feeling especially down on yourself, you might want to work on reducing the sheer volume of media messaging you take in every day. Mute your TV during commercials and wander into the next room while they’re on, or look at something else altogether. I would recommend this for all commercials, as even the ones that aren’t selling beauty or weight-loss products — such as ads for beer, cars and yogurt — tend to feature idealized body types. Do the same thing for online video commercials that flaunt airbrushed bodies — these are even easier to ignore since all it takes is minimizing the window for thirty seconds. When body-focused ads come up on your Facebook sidebar or appear on other websites, mark them as “irrelevant” or “offensive” and keep doing so until they stop showing up.
Keep your sanity in mind when you make decisions about the media consumption you can control. You don’t have to give up your favorite show or magazine permanently just because its messaging isn’t all that body-positive, but you need to be self-aware. Most of us have days when we feel good or at least OK about our bodies and days when we want to hide in a dark room forever. “America’s Next Top Model” might not be the best choice on the latter kind of day. Save the catalog-browsing for a time when you’re feeling stronger. If necessary, cut back on the porn.
Wanting to “get in shape” is a perfectly admirable goal, but many people get discouraged and feel even worse about themselves because they try to adhere to an artificial ideal of what “getting in shape” looks like. There is absolutely no reason to take up running if you hate it or go to the gym if it intimidates you. Hit the pool instead. Garden. Hula hoop. Play Frisbee with your friends. Put on some jams and dance alone in your apartment. By doing more of whatever movement-based activities you already enjoy more regularly, you have a better chance of getting more active — thereby reaping the health benefits — than by trying to “get fit” the way you think everybody else is. This way, you’re less likely to quit after two weeks.
Compare yourself to the other beautiful people in your life — in a good way. Chances are, for every quality you dislike most about yourself, there’s someone you think is gorgeous who shares it. This will always reveal some of the most absurd contradictions in your perception of yourself and others. A friend of mine who considers herself hideously obese was embarrassed to admit that yes, she did technically know that her beautiful girlfriend is almost exactly the same size.
Which brings me to my last point — when “swimsuit season” rolls around, we are all in the same sweaty, insecure boat. The guy who puts you to shame on the treadmill is worried about his skinny arms, the girl with the curves to pull off dresses that look like tents on you is trying to lose 10 pounds and the hot waiter you flirted with last weekend is unhappy about his stomach. Just remember, someone you’d never think of is wishing they looked as great as you do.