Unless you’re a fan of “Carmen Sandiego” or your parents wrapped your lunch in National… Unless you’re a fan of “Carmen Sandiego” or your parents wrapped your lunch in National Geographic maps, you’ve probably never heard of Kyrgyzstan.

There’s no reason you should have. It’s a country with a population smaller than New York City’s. The average American couldn’t pronounce any of its cities correctly even if he could name them.

If it sounds familiar, it’s because the small, former Soviet republic had a revolution recently. No big deal.

It all began with an election done the way only the former Soviet republics can: with fraud. For a few days, Kyrgyzstan had two parliaments for the price of one, but that didn’t last long. At the end of last month, groups of revolutionaries converged on Bishkek, the capital, by foot and bus to oust the government and exiled the president, Askar Akayev.

By western standards, Akayev was a tyrant. He governed Kyrgyzstan with an iron fist and treated the economy like his family’s piggy bank. Under his regime, the nation racked up the worst debt of any other central Asian nation and forced three out of every 10 Kyrgyz people to work in surrounding countries under terrible circumstances just to stay alive.

All this means is, by Stalinist standards, he was a big softie.

But this will not stand in the modern world, as freedom is spreading to the dark corners of the earth. The victories of opposition movements in other former Soviet nations and the former Yugoslavia have heralded the new trend of a democracy-loving generation replacing the authoritarian regimes of yesteryear.

Of course, there were democracy-loving generations before this one. This one is succeeding because it’s America’s sweetheart.

Earlier this year, the Bush administration issued an ultimatum to Akayev’s government, saying that they had to prove their dedication to democracy by holding real elections on time, a test that the regime failed. Roza Otunbayeva, a leader of the Kyrgyz opposition that ousted Akayev, admitted openly that his organization is supported by the United States.

Some of the same U.S.-based foundations that sponsored opposition movements in eastern European and central Asian countries, including the recent “Orange Revolution” in Ukraine, have offices in Bishkek. A U.S. State Department office in the city has been issuing newspapers with opposition messages for three years.

These seem like the good old American values of the Cold War, when we were discreetly helping small movements overthrow cruel authoritarians. During the Cold War, we weren’t fighting an open war in our attempt to convert the planet to democratic values. The United States could quietly lurk behind the scenes without mass casualties or in-depth news coverage.

But neither silent subversion nor open invasion seems to work well in the long run for us. The last time U.S. aid helped liberate an oppressed state with a Muslim majority by assisting a small opposition party, the state was Afghanistan and the party became the Taliban. In addition, all I have to say is the word “Iraq” and someone nearby will say that U.S. troops should get the hell out and come home.

I am the last person to stand in the way of freedom. I am a true conservative, meaning that the only gospel I adhere to is the strict wording of the U.S. Constitution. Everyone has the right to experience freedom, but we are shoving freedom down hungry throats in parts of the world that are already unstable to begin with.

After our assistance to Serbia’s Novia Serbskaya, Georgia’s Labor Party, Ukraine’s Orange Revolution and now Kyrgyzstan’s Tulip revolutionaries, what is next? Belarus’ Adradzhennye movement? Turkmenistan’s anti-Ashgabat activists?

I guess it would help if any of this made sense.

But it doesn’t. These are all efforts that our media doesn’t cover, and it’s difficult to get specific information on any of these small nations with the remnants of Soviet authority (and Soviet weapons) which may be next on the U.S. liberation list.

It may be prudent to tread lightly in our efforts to spread freedom. One thing that everybody learned from Sept. 11, 2001, was that we can never tell where the next cradle of terrorism will emerge.

Michael Mastroianni thinks real freedom will only be accomplished the right way. E-mail him at [email protected].