Satire | 5 classic novels to take to the beach this summer
By Leah Mensch, Opinions Editor
July 16, 2019
The Goodreads Popular Beach Read Books ranking has gone live, and there is only one thing to do with this list. Print it out, crumple it in a ball and recycle it.
Satire | Summer: The Flaming Oakland Trash Pile of Seasons
By Allison Dantinne, Senior Staff Columnist
July 16, 2019
If I took anything from the hot second I spent in Physics 1 before withdrawing, it’s that what goes up must come down. I believe this law must also apply to weather. Therefore, what must be cold will eventually become hot. And hot it has become.
Opinion | Residence Hall Horoscopes
By Allison Dantinne, Senior Staff Columnist
June 29, 2019
Just like you, each of Pitt’s residence halls has its own distinct character.
Opinion | June Horoscopes
By Allison Dantinne, Senior Staff Columnist
June 18, 2019
Summer is upon us. The weather becomes hot. The air becomes sticky. The Geminis finally crawl back into the wretched pits from whence we came. There is a sense of calm. Check your horoscope to see what else the stars have in store for you this Cancer season.
Opinion | 5 ways to relieve stress through comedy
By Allison Dantinne, Senior Staff Columnist
April 21, 2019
When finals season rolls around, it’s hard to not feel the crushing weight of the world on your shoulders. It’s hard not to see your GPA in physical form, beating you over the head for taking a “What ocean sponge are you?” quiz instead of paying attention to the lecture.
Opinion | Serious March horoscopes
By Allison Dantinne, Senior Staff Columnist
March 21, 2019
Just some rigorous and serious March horoscopes. These are arguably the most accurate March horoscopes that can be found today.
Opinion | Market Impossible: 12 Hours in Market Central
By Allison Dantinne, Senior Staff Columnist
March 7, 2019
I spent from 9 a.m to 9 p.m. on Saturday in Market, learning about Market, coming to understand Market and, eventually, becoming Market.
Top 10: Reasons to cancel classes
By The Pitt News Editorial Board
February 1, 2019
From time to time, we may have to cancel classes — and here are 10 reasons why.
Opinion | Decent, good and chaotic: a glimpse into life on the Port Authority 71C
By Allison Dantinne, Staff Columnist
January 31, 2019
The public bus is an interesting gathering of Pittsburgh’s citizens, a demented family reunion featuring a wild cast of characters all wishing to achieve something and go somewhere.
Opinion | Ode to Rite Aid
By Maggie Koontz, Senior Staff Columnist
January 23, 2019
Going to pick up a couple of items should be pretty straightforward, and with Rite Aid, it totally is. Activities like dodging the scaffolding beams as I walk down the sidewalk and watching all those white plastic tarps flutter in the wind are just business as usual in Oakland.
Opinion | Accurate, peer-reviewed horoscopes
By Allison Dantinne, Staff Columnist
January 17, 2019
Do you use Apple Music? Do you enjoy it? Do you like to pop, and lock, and jam, and break? Reconsider this stance, Aquarius.
Opinion | 2019: New year, same me
By Allison Dantinne, Staff Columnist
January 7, 2019
Big goals don’t usually pan out. So instead of focusing on big changes that I’m not even sure will make me feel like a better, more interesting person, this year I made a list of fun and achievable goals.
Winter, the Oakland garbage pile of seasons
By Allison Dantinne, Staff Columnist
November 30, 2018
I’ve walked past a smashed-up pumpkin loitering on the sidewalk in front of my house several times a day in recent weeks. It reminds me of two things looming on the horizon, both of which I hate to think about — I am surrounded by other people’s garbage, and autumn is over.
House Hunters: Oakland Edition
By Allison Dantinne, Staff Columnist
November 15, 2018
There comes a time in every Pitt student’s life when even grilled-cheese day at Market doesn’t make your on-campus living experience any less dismal. You’re ready to move on to bigger and better things. You’re an adult. You want to make grilled cheese yourself, whenever you want it.
5 obsolete jobs we need to bring back
By Kim Rooney, Contributing Editor
July 18, 2018
There’s plenty of best-paying job lists you may feel tempted to pore over. But before you do, consider the careers that fell by the wayside in the past decades or centuries.