As a One Direction fan, there are a multitude of dates that we all seem to remember. July 23 is One Direction’s anniversary, March 25 is when Zayn Malik officially left the band, Aug. 23 is when the group officially announced a hiatus and in January 2016, the band’s hiatus became indefinite. Now in 2024, Oct. 16 is another date added — the death of Liam Payne.
Growing up, One Direction had such a large impact on my life, just like they did with the other millions of kids out there. I discovered them on YouTube by watching Harry Styles’ first X Factor audition and became obsessed. I watched all the music videos, learned the words to every song and at one point, I was even reading fan fiction based on them. Not my proudest moment, but still a moment in time that shaped me into who I am today.
Being a fangirl at such a young age molded me into the woman I am now. It gave me an appreciation for music and taught me how to love something with my entire heart. Almost 10 years after I discovered the band, I still love each of the boys, and finding out Liam Payne had died almost put me in a state of shock.
When the band was still in their prime, you could always sort of tell that Liam was the least liked of all the boys. Even now, I don’t know what it was about him that didn’t click with the fans. He was talented, charismatic, cute and had all the qualities of being a star. As a kid, I always felt bad that people didn’t like him as much, and I had a soft spot for him because of that.
Finding out that Liam had died transported me back to 2014, and I was 10 years old again. To think that someone you grew up with and someone you had looked up to is no longer in this world is sad. Then, also finding out that Payne’s death was a result of being on multiple drugs after he battled with substance abuse for many years was tough to come to terms with. To millions of people, Liam Payne was an international superstar, but he was so much more than that. There is now a boy out there without his father, parents without a son and sisters without their brother.
While I found myself grieving, I felt conflicted because I knew Liam Payne was not a good person. In my head, Payne is still the same person he was in One Direction because that’s how I want to remember him. But the recent news of his ex-fiance, Maya Henry, coming out about the abuse that she suffered when they were together put a lot of things in perspective for me.
I still remember when the news came out that Liam Payne and Maya Henry were in a relationship, and I instantly fell in love with her as well as their relationship. You would always see them posting about each other on social media, and it seemed as if they had a picture-perfect relationship. But I always seem to forget that social media is usually a facade, and we never truly know what someone is going through.
Recently, Maya Henry published a novel called “Looking Forward” — a book that was inspired by true events in her life. The book is about the pain and abuse that she suffered while in a relationship with Payne. Although I haven’t read the book, I feel immense empathy for her and can only think of how brave she is for having the strength to come forward about her abuse, knowing that her abuser has millions of fans.
The phrase “believe women” always seems to lose power whenever a woman accuses a beloved man of abuse. This is exactly the case for Maya Henry. One Direction fans are very ride-or-die for the boys of the group and will go to crazy lengths to defend them. In this case, many fans are blaming Henry for the death of Payne when she had nothing to do with it.
On Goodreads, “Looking Forward” has 134 one-star reviews. Most of these reviews are recent and come from fans looking to shame Henry. A lot of the reviews focus on the fact that this book shouldn’t have been published because Henry knew that Payne was struggling mentally and that this book just added to his worsening mental health. Even though this book has been out for months, people are still using it as a scapegoat because they want someone to blame. To discredit Henry’s story because her abuser is your fave is crazy and diabolical work.
It’s common for fans to think they have a personal bond with their favorite artist, even though they never will. Parasocial relationships can be highly dangerous since they have the potential to obscure the truth from fans, especially in situations like this. People believing it’s acceptable to call a woman they don’t know a liar after sharing her story of abuse is concerning and not normal.
It was not Maya Henry’s responsibility to get help for Payne, because he was a grown man. He was responsible for his actions and had to bear the consequences of them. Liam Payne’s death was not a result of this book being published — his death was a result of a multitude of things that do not involve Henry in any way.
Thinking about all of this clouds how I — and I’m sure many people — want to grieve and remember Liam Payne. I think it is still possible to grieve Payne for the artist he was and the nostalgia he gave us. I also think you can recognize the fact he was not a good person and that this is someone who made unfortunate choices that will forever taint his legacy.
Danae Poteat writes primarily about pop culture and current events. Write to her at [email protected].